"In every contract Johnson signs, there is what’s called a no-lose clause."
That is hilarious and the lamest thing I've ever heard.
I hope you take it as a credit to your writing that I was sure you were making that up until a few paragraphs later (you've occasionally blended fact and fiction, after all). I'm still not 100% convinced it's true, and while I could do my own research, I've decided that I prefer to live in a world where "action stars" have such ridiculous contact clauses for their movies.
Well, I do like to blend the line between fact and fiction and speak in hyperbole for the sake of entertainment, but this is one of those things that I assure you is absolutely true. I'll give the caveat that most sources will say that it's "reported" that Johnson has them in their contracts, but it is not as preposterous as it sounds. Some actors have "no death" clauses that prevent them from being cast in roles where their character dies. Tom Cruise has a clause in his contracts that his likeness cannot be replicated in other media such as video games adjacent to his movies (without his express consent, that is). Apparently, Samuel L. Jackson's contracts guarantee that he's allowed to take time off the shoot to golf twice a week. It's kind of like the famous "Van Halen No Brown M&Ms" contract that they signed with concert venues; a lot of these people will make demands through their contracts, some more ridiculous than others.
Considering the propensity for Hollywood to do dumb shit like having a 95 pound girlboss kick the shit out of a human monster like the Rock just to "subvert expectations" it kind of makes a little sense. But in the context of capeshit movies it is indefensible, because that's the point.
Also, sometimes the actor gets a "guaranteed death" clause written in, like Harrison Ford when he agreed to do the garbage Star Wars sequel. He ensured he got killed off after the first one.
I liked the Rock as a kid. My first movie of his was Grid Iron Gang, which wasn't pretty good. The Scorpion King and the prequal movie with Randy Couture are guilty pleasures, but the third is garbage. CGI aside, I like the second Mummy movie. Great article.
I think I should probably revisit the second Mummy just to make sure I'm not being unkind, as I saw it a handful of times when it released and that was over two decades ago (hard to believe). The first one, though, was a perennial staple at sleep overs when I was, like, eight, and I have vivid memories of seeing the third in theaters with my friends I used to watch it with and all of us leaving the theater disappointed.
Your welcome. Also, on The Rock's previous presidential ambitions, it would fit America's pattern of B-movie star, TV Celebrity, to Wrestler. Just need a Boxer now. lol! 🤣👍
He dropped like a rock 😬. I did not know he was interested in running for president or about his crazy movie contract clauses. Fascinating stuff, and interesting and well written, too. Thanks so much.
Man, your closer reminded me that Broken Lizard gave up on this screenplay:
"The Greek Road" was a proposed comedy project by the Broken Lizard troupe, envisioned as a Monty Python-esque spoof set in ancient Greece. The plot centered on a young Plato, portrayed by Kevin Heffernan, a freshman wrestling recruit at Athens University who is failing his philosophy class, Basic Thought. To help him pass, Socrates, played by Steve Lemme, is brought in as his tutor. The narrative follows their journey to the Olympics, with Greek gods Zeus, Poseidon, and Hades—portrayed by Jay Chandrasekhar, Paul Soter, and Erik Stolhanske, respectively—intervening along the way.
Interesting peek into the life and times of a character I was only dimly aware of. And kind of a shame you aren't a wrestling fan, since I'd love to see an article about that whole phenomenon from you. The whole idea of a scripted sport that kinda-sorta pretends to be real is fascinating in itself, and it's also such an extremely American cultural artifact.
As for Johnson, the thing the stuck with me the most here was how much he apparently cared about the content of the role and how his character came across. You'd think someone as rich and successful as him would see these films as a trashy chore to bring in some quick cash, but he really went out of his way to actually shape the role. Of course I'm not excusing his terrible behavior and ego-centrism, but I can't help feel there's something almost sweet about it too. How he was that desperate to have his guy come across as a super badass. Also had no idea big-name actors would write those kinds of detailed clauses about not getting hit too much etc into their contracts. Again, I figured most of them saw superheroes and all that stuff as deeply beneath them and just turned up and did whatever was put in front of them for the paycheck.
Finally, I think it says a lot about the state of our culture that someone felt we needed a holiday action movie cinematic universe, not to mention a movie about Superman's goddamn dog. Maybe that last one crosses over into being funny in an absurd way, haha.
I'm not opposed to writing about professional wrestling; I absolutely love the behind-the-scenes stories and history of it all, and, one day, I really would like to dig into it deeper. The biggest problem is that wrestling "lore", as it is, is so broad and expansive that succinctly capturing it all, even in a handful of articles, would be difficult. There's also a lot of context you need to understand it since the stories of so many wrestlers cross over with one another, and the same could be said of the various promotions. It's like you can't just tell one story, you kind of have to explain them all to get the bigger picture, if that makes sense.
Like I said, I commend Johnson's work ethic and dedication; you can knock the guy for a lot of things but working hard and caring for his projects is not one of them. He truly believed in Black Adam and while I think it's probably best for the entertainment industry overall it didn't do gangbusters, I will admit that I can sympathize with his disappointment in its under performance. He really did have passion for the project that can be commended. I also think, though, that the genuine passion he had for the role, the character, and his ambitions were largely lost through all the reworking, rewriting, and reshooting; by the end, the film was basically three different movies cobbled together, and whatever sincerity the Rock might have put on display was lost in the chaos. Would it have done better had it been left unmolested? Probably in the same sense as Zach Snyder's Justice League would have been better received; I know this is a controversial opinion with some, but I don't care for the Snyder Cut of Justice League... but I do think it is vastly superior to the theatrical release, and DC should have just let Snyder have his way. But the "Warner Brother's Don't Fuck Up DC Movies Challenge" is seemingly set to HELL ON EARTH difficulty since they are, apparently, pathologically unable to get out of their own way.
Lastly, to be fair... I'd rather watch the Krypto the Superdog movie than a holiday action movie cinematic universe. Like I said, Hollywood is so desperate to catch the lightning of the MCU in a bottle again and, after five years of that project falling apart in real time, I really don't understand why. I genuinely think the MCU was a once in a generation phenomenon and no amount of attempting to brute force that spark to relight is going to work.
I think one with a narrow focus on the Golden Age of the WWF (not the "WWE") in the 1980s tying it in to the larger culture of the decade and why it is a cultural touchstone in a way I think modern pro wrestling isn't would be cool. Besides, the 80s wrestlers had such astounding personalities in real life, like the Iron Sheik, or Andre The Giant. Or the GOAT, the Macho Man himself. It seems that they had fun with it in a way foreign to guys like Dwayne.
"the indigenous Amazonian tribesmen playing extras in the movie asked director Werner Herzog if he wanted them to kill Kinski for him"
That's fucking amazing. I would love to overhear that conversation.
Anyway, I managed to miss the entire trainwreck that apparently was Black Adam. Maybe because I was turned off by the DCEU in general, and Shazam specifically. (Zach Levi seems to be okay as a person, AFAIK, but literally nothing in the promotional materials made me want to see Shazam.)
I'm a DC nerd, but the whole cinematic edifice has been misbegotten from the start. Jamming Dwayne Johnson into it was never going to save it.
"In every contract Johnson signs, there is what’s called a no-lose clause."
That is hilarious and the lamest thing I've ever heard.
I hope you take it as a credit to your writing that I was sure you were making that up until a few paragraphs later (you've occasionally blended fact and fiction, after all). I'm still not 100% convinced it's true, and while I could do my own research, I've decided that I prefer to live in a world where "action stars" have such ridiculous contact clauses for their movies.
Well, I do like to blend the line between fact and fiction and speak in hyperbole for the sake of entertainment, but this is one of those things that I assure you is absolutely true. I'll give the caveat that most sources will say that it's "reported" that Johnson has them in their contracts, but it is not as preposterous as it sounds. Some actors have "no death" clauses that prevent them from being cast in roles where their character dies. Tom Cruise has a clause in his contracts that his likeness cannot be replicated in other media such as video games adjacent to his movies (without his express consent, that is). Apparently, Samuel L. Jackson's contracts guarantee that he's allowed to take time off the shoot to golf twice a week. It's kind of like the famous "Van Halen No Brown M&Ms" contract that they signed with concert venues; a lot of these people will make demands through their contracts, some more ridiculous than others.
Considering the propensity for Hollywood to do dumb shit like having a 95 pound girlboss kick the shit out of a human monster like the Rock just to "subvert expectations" it kind of makes a little sense. But in the context of capeshit movies it is indefensible, because that's the point.
Also, sometimes the actor gets a "guaranteed death" clause written in, like Harrison Ford when he agreed to do the garbage Star Wars sequel. He ensured he got killed off after the first one.
Fun fact along those lines; Danny Trejo has a death clause in his contracts as well that states if he's playing a villain, the character has to die.
The pebble
I liked the Rock as a kid. My first movie of his was Grid Iron Gang, which wasn't pretty good. The Scorpion King and the prequal movie with Randy Couture are guilty pleasures, but the third is garbage. CGI aside, I like the second Mummy movie. Great article.
I think I should probably revisit the second Mummy just to make sure I'm not being unkind, as I saw it a handful of times when it released and that was over two decades ago (hard to believe). The first one, though, was a perennial staple at sleep overs when I was, like, eight, and I have vivid memories of seeing the third in theaters with my friends I used to watch it with and all of us leaving the theater disappointed.
All the same, glad you enjoyed the article.
Your welcome. Also, on The Rock's previous presidential ambitions, it would fit America's pattern of B-movie star, TV Celebrity, to Wrestler. Just need a Boxer now. lol! 🤣👍
Mike Tyson... where are you.
"Vladimir Putin, you fucking punk, thtop thith war in Ukraine right now or I'll rip off your head and thit down your neck."
I now have a new headcanon where Tyson and Putin bond over raising pigeons.
Hilarious read. I hope you laughed as much researching all of this as I did reading it. Because if you didn't, well, it must've been awful.
He dropped like a rock 😬. I did not know he was interested in running for president or about his crazy movie contract clauses. Fascinating stuff, and interesting and well written, too. Thanks so much.
Man, your closer reminded me that Broken Lizard gave up on this screenplay:
"The Greek Road" was a proposed comedy project by the Broken Lizard troupe, envisioned as a Monty Python-esque spoof set in ancient Greece. The plot centered on a young Plato, portrayed by Kevin Heffernan, a freshman wrestling recruit at Athens University who is failing his philosophy class, Basic Thought. To help him pass, Socrates, played by Steve Lemme, is brought in as his tutor. The narrative follows their journey to the Olympics, with Greek gods Zeus, Poseidon, and Hades—portrayed by Jay Chandrasekhar, Paul Soter, and Erik Stolhanske, respectively—intervening along the way.
Interesting peek into the life and times of a character I was only dimly aware of. And kind of a shame you aren't a wrestling fan, since I'd love to see an article about that whole phenomenon from you. The whole idea of a scripted sport that kinda-sorta pretends to be real is fascinating in itself, and it's also such an extremely American cultural artifact.
As for Johnson, the thing the stuck with me the most here was how much he apparently cared about the content of the role and how his character came across. You'd think someone as rich and successful as him would see these films as a trashy chore to bring in some quick cash, but he really went out of his way to actually shape the role. Of course I'm not excusing his terrible behavior and ego-centrism, but I can't help feel there's something almost sweet about it too. How he was that desperate to have his guy come across as a super badass. Also had no idea big-name actors would write those kinds of detailed clauses about not getting hit too much etc into their contracts. Again, I figured most of them saw superheroes and all that stuff as deeply beneath them and just turned up and did whatever was put in front of them for the paycheck.
Finally, I think it says a lot about the state of our culture that someone felt we needed a holiday action movie cinematic universe, not to mention a movie about Superman's goddamn dog. Maybe that last one crosses over into being funny in an absurd way, haha.
I'm not opposed to writing about professional wrestling; I absolutely love the behind-the-scenes stories and history of it all, and, one day, I really would like to dig into it deeper. The biggest problem is that wrestling "lore", as it is, is so broad and expansive that succinctly capturing it all, even in a handful of articles, would be difficult. There's also a lot of context you need to understand it since the stories of so many wrestlers cross over with one another, and the same could be said of the various promotions. It's like you can't just tell one story, you kind of have to explain them all to get the bigger picture, if that makes sense.
Like I said, I commend Johnson's work ethic and dedication; you can knock the guy for a lot of things but working hard and caring for his projects is not one of them. He truly believed in Black Adam and while I think it's probably best for the entertainment industry overall it didn't do gangbusters, I will admit that I can sympathize with his disappointment in its under performance. He really did have passion for the project that can be commended. I also think, though, that the genuine passion he had for the role, the character, and his ambitions were largely lost through all the reworking, rewriting, and reshooting; by the end, the film was basically three different movies cobbled together, and whatever sincerity the Rock might have put on display was lost in the chaos. Would it have done better had it been left unmolested? Probably in the same sense as Zach Snyder's Justice League would have been better received; I know this is a controversial opinion with some, but I don't care for the Snyder Cut of Justice League... but I do think it is vastly superior to the theatrical release, and DC should have just let Snyder have his way. But the "Warner Brother's Don't Fuck Up DC Movies Challenge" is seemingly set to HELL ON EARTH difficulty since they are, apparently, pathologically unable to get out of their own way.
Lastly, to be fair... I'd rather watch the Krypto the Superdog movie than a holiday action movie cinematic universe. Like I said, Hollywood is so desperate to catch the lightning of the MCU in a bottle again and, after five years of that project falling apart in real time, I really don't understand why. I genuinely think the MCU was a once in a generation phenomenon and no amount of attempting to brute force that spark to relight is going to work.
I think one with a narrow focus on the Golden Age of the WWF (not the "WWE") in the 1980s tying it in to the larger culture of the decade and why it is a cultural touchstone in a way I think modern pro wrestling isn't would be cool. Besides, the 80s wrestlers had such astounding personalities in real life, like the Iron Sheik, or Andre The Giant. Or the GOAT, the Macho Man himself. It seems that they had fun with it in a way foreign to guys like Dwayne.
https://www.ryandunlavey.com/comics/action-philosophers
This is how I knew Plato was a rassler
Bro why is this so long
"the indigenous Amazonian tribesmen playing extras in the movie asked director Werner Herzog if he wanted them to kill Kinski for him"
That's fucking amazing. I would love to overhear that conversation.
Anyway, I managed to miss the entire trainwreck that apparently was Black Adam. Maybe because I was turned off by the DCEU in general, and Shazam specifically. (Zach Levi seems to be okay as a person, AFAIK, but literally nothing in the promotional materials made me want to see Shazam.)
I'm a DC nerd, but the whole cinematic edifice has been misbegotten from the start. Jamming Dwayne Johnson into it was never going to save it.